PREPARING FOR COACHING

clarefielding
Jul 25, 2025
5 min read

Updated: Aug 25, 2025

Thank you for your interest in coaching with me. You might be wondering what is involved.

If you have never had coaching before, preparing to embark on a programme of coaching can be something of a blank page. There’s no rulebook, and different coaches will have different approaches to coaching.

What is a common factor is the importance of preparation for coaching, defining your goals and structuring the coaching relationship properly. Practitioners in the coaching field call this contracting. A scope of work should be clearly set out and agreed before the actual coaching work begins. The clarity and quality of contracting lays the foundation for your experience of coaching and the return on investment you are likely to get from it.

It establishes the scope of the work, activates the mandate to get on with it, defines boundaries and makes explicit the protocols for how we will work together. It’s also not something that happens just at the start of the relationship – we keep the basis of the contracting under review as we move along. There are all kinds of reasons why we might re-contract during a coaching relationship.

What is coaching?
But first – what is coaching? There are various definitions of coaching in the academic literature in the field. I prefer to describe it rather than try to define it - I think of it as the process by which a coach facilitates their client’s self-learning and development or facilitates a sustainable change in their behaviour or performance. It is about helping a client through change or to bring about sustainable change. Coaching is different to mentoring or supervision in that the coach is not advising the client, still less telling them, what they should do. Coaching is also different to therapy in that the coaching client is assumed to be well and not in need of any healing intervention.

Coaching is also different from talking things through with a spouse, partner or with friends, even very patient ones. The coach brings no prior baggage and can be completely independent and non- judgmental. A coach and their client meet as equals, they partner together on the coaching assignment.

Key questions to ask yourself in preparation for the introductory meeting
There are some fundamental questions that it is useful for potential clients to think about in advance of the introductory meeting.
What do you want to achieve? What is your goal?
You might have an overall goal (“I really want that promotion…”) but without clarity about what that means in
practice, the coaching may lack focus and structure, however experienced the coach may be. What change do you seek? What things do you need to do, specifically, to bring it about? To what extent have you done any of them already? How did it go?

But defining a goal is not as easy as it sounds. You may be coming to coaching because you have an issue or series of issues to resolve, or you may know that you want to change something in some way but are not sure in exactly what way. Or you may not have a “problem” at all – maybe you have an idea or an opportunity and you want to talk through about how you can best realise it.

Do not worry if you can’t initially express your goal in high-definition, easily “coachable” terms – quite often the first part of the coaching process after contracting is to help you work out what your goal is.

What would you change? What do you want to be different?
Maybe the answer is “nothing”. Maybe someone else has suggested that you should have coaching. Or maybe you have a perception that you should have coaching, without really wanting to have coaching. In all of these cases, the benefits for you are likely to be limited. Coaching works best when the client has a clear idea of what they want to change or what they want to be different, whether that is something in themselves or something in the world around them.
How realistic are your expectations?
Are you going to make that directorial position by next year or are there more steps you need to take to put yourself in a position from which to build toward your goal? It’s important that you (and your coach) believe that it is possible for you to achieve your goal.
How prepared are you to try out new things?
It’s often said that if you go on doing the same things you have done before you will get the same results as before. Are you aware of your habits? Are you prepared to break out of them and try new things? Are you willing to try new things even if they are out of your comfort zone or do not lead to success?
How willing are you to put in time and effort?
Coaching is like anything – the more you put in, the more you get out. Will you show up for sessions? Will you “show up” in the sense of being fully present and engaged in your sessions? Will you commit to taking any actions that you identify through your thinking?
Are you prepared to be challenged or taken outside of your comfort zone?
How much would you like to be challenged or pushed? (Be honest!) And in what circumstances? Are there no-go areas for you? (It’s fine if there are, but good if we identify them up front.)
Can you be honest with me?
We need to agree to be honest with each other at all times in our work, especially if something isn’t working.

The introductory meeting

We will have an introductory meeting before we create a coaching relationship. This is important as it will give us a chance to establish whether I am the right coach for you and to define the work we will do together.

I have devised a model to help with this, that I call the TOMS model.

The TOMS model applies not just when we are defining the overall assignment, it is a useful way to start each individual coaching session. Let TOMS be your friend.

We’ll also cover some other important things:

· Confidentiality

· Logistics. Time, place, number and duration of sessions. An assignment comprises a set number of sessions, I usually recommend six. We can always re-contract for more if we are not done.

· Boundaries and emotions

· What happens if it’s not working?

· Payment (if applicable)